Mourning just "US"

So I obviously have a million emotions coursing through my body right now, and the latest one isn't one I was expecting - almost a mourning or sense of loss. Don't get me wrong, I am SO excited to become a parent and meet Petrie in a few short days/weeks, but this week it just hit me that it will no longer be just me and Tyge - no longer just US.

Some say that before you get married you mourn your single life - I guess that's what bachelor and bachelorette parties are for, right?

Winter 2009

Well I never had that feeling before I married Tyge - I could not WAIT to leave my old single life behind and spend the rest of my life with him. And it's been the best 3.5 years of my life to date!

With him gone this week I've had a lot of time to reflect back at all the wonderful memories we've made since meeting in 2007, and I'm not just being cliche when I say that I fall more in love with him every day. Dating him was so fresh, exciting, and new - he was unlike any other guy I'd ever dated and I knew even back then that there was something special about this one and God had big plans for us.

One of our first photos together, 4th of July 2007

As much as I enjoyed the dating stage, I was thrilled when engagement came in 2008 and was so excited to begin that next chapter of having Tyge as my fiance.

Those 9 months flew by and before I knew it, our wedding day and honeymoon came and went, and we settled into life as newlyweds living together for the first time.

Life was great - we were so in love, so happy to be living together in our rental home, and so giddy about what the future held for us. We had really nothing tying us down, not too many responsibilities, date night whenever we wanted, like I said - life was great!

We took the next step in October of that same year and bought our first house, which brought it's first set of challenges our way - home ownership. :) The house hunting process was stressful at times but Tyge and I leaned on each other and in the end bought our dream home. I remember looking at houses and picturing certain rooms as the kids room, imagining our future family sitting down at dinner together, the possibilities were endless.

A few months into living there and we decided we were ready for a little more responsibility and wanted to try pet parenthood before real parenthood - enter Keely girl!

Our first "family" photo

It may sound silly, but the experience of raising a puppy with Tyge was an awesome one and we learned a lot about each other and how we would raise future children - luckily, we were on the same page for most things! Keely has brought so much joy to our lives and I love watching him with her - he is such a great pet Dad that I know he will be a fantastic "real" Dad as well.

Though our married life together has been amazingly blessed, it hasn't been without it's challenges, the biggest of which came last fall with the miscarriage. Aside from the deaths of two of my grandparents that Tyge has been with me for, it was our greatest loss we've experienced together. He was my rock - I have no idea how I would have made it through that time without him. It truly brought us closer together and made me realize that I was really ready to be a "real" parent with him as my partner.

So I know having a baby will only enrich our lives and make me even more in love with him, and 2 days into that "new" life I won't even be able to imagine life without Petrie, but right now I had to admit I'm feeling a little sad that it won't be just us two anymore. I'm hoping that's somewhat normal? Like I said, it just hit me this week that we really only have a week left (while he's here) of just "us" time before our lives are turned upside down, in a GOOD way, but forever changed nonetheless. With each stage of life we've entered into together it's gotten better and better, and I 100% know with all my heart this next stage of parenthood will be the best one yet. However, I still can't help but feel a little scared and sad that (for the next 20+ years anyway!) it will no longer be just "Tyge & Kate".

I guess all this is to say that for the rest of the days before Petrie gets here I vow to take the time to enjoy my husband, to go on dates with him, spend quality time with him, tell him how much I love him, not worry about to-do lists, not spend time doing menial tasks that can wait, but to just soak up all the time left we have as just US,

before Petrie gets here and our lives are changed for the better when we become a family of three (or four with Keely). :)