Yesterday, I finished as much of the work day as I could and went home around 2 PM. I called my mom on the way home to tell her, and she handled it so well. She didn't cry, didn't ask questions, didn't go overboard, just listened and offered kind advice and love. When she asked if her and dad could bring by dinner and hug me and Tyge, I said yes. I already had soup made from Monday night but sometimes a girl just needs her mom and dad, no matter how old she is. From there I made it home and tried to eat something. I was just about to close my eyes on the couch when Tyge got home and together we sat on the couch and held each other and (I) cried for I don't know how long. He then called his parents, and that was the third time I've seen Tyge cry (our wedding, brother's cancer news, and Marley & Me. He won't admit that last one but I saw a tear). They had all also just learned that Brian would need surgery for his cancerous tumor after 3 months of intense chemo, so it was a rough day for the Blombergs. His parents naturally wanted to come right over, but I wasn't up to seeing many people. My parents came over shortly after that to bring hugs and a yummy dinner. They didn't stay long which was perfect, but offered their love and support. Just what I needed. Tyge and I sat down to eat the yummy chilli and cornbread (and I enjoyed some of the white wine my mom so thoughtfully brought!) and just as we were finishing the doorbell rang.
A few friends knew at this point as Tyge sent out an email (I'll get to that later) but I really didn't want to see anyone. Except Betsy, but she lives an hour away and Tyge had just recently sent the email - there was no way it was her. I "hid" in the dining room and heard a voice asking "Is your wife here?" after he opened the door. It was her. My best friend of 25 years drove an hour just to give me a hug. She ran up the stairs and gave me the fiercest hug, and just when I thought I was all cried out for the day, I cried as I hugged my best friend for 10 minutes straight. She said she felt like she lost a family member, and just wanted to come give me a hug. I cannot put into words how much it meant to me that she dropped everything to drive almost 2 hours roundtrip just to give me a hug. She didn't just ASK what I needed, didn't just OFFER up help, she just showed up. That's a true friend.
In addition to Betsy, Tyge and I are blessed with many other close friends in ours lives, who we couldn't imagine doing life without. It was important for us to tell our parents, Brian and Naomi, and for me to tell Betsy, but we just weren't up to telling everyone else our "Backwards Announcement". So Tyge sent out the below email titled just that:
Hello friends - I'm writing this message to inform you that we miscarried today after being over five weeks along. We found out we were pregnant two weeks ago today, and this past weekend Kate had noticed some bleeding, which has since increased, coupled with a blood test yesterday revealing that her HCG levels are far below where they should be at this stage, hence confirming a miscarriage has occurred.
It's amazing how attached prospective parents can become so quickly. Kate had started a journal reflecting on some of the things that had occurred since she found out including having to wait all day to tell me, my shocked reaction, the excitement that followed, and lots of future planning / thinking. We nicknamed him or her, and were struggling to keep it from family and friends until we were out of "the danger zone" in a few more weeks. We had our ploys set on how to tell parents, family, and friends, and were praying for the little one regularly. After close friends of ours had miscarried, we were both hypersensitive about the subject and started to have unfounded concern.
So here is the deal. Kate and I fully trust in the Lord in all things. We know He loves us very much, and has an amazing plan for our lives. If you guys could ask the Father on our behalf for physical healing for Kate as her body is undergoing some trauma associated with this, and also emotional healing, that would be really special to us. We are truly blessed in every way imaginable, and so thankful to have so much love in our lives from God, Family, and Friends. Along with prayer, Kate said it was ok to be free to send a email\call\text to love on us a little. We don't promise to get back to anything right now, but please know that it is well received.
Love to you all - thanks for being great friends in our lives.
- Tyge & Kate
Since Tyge sent that email Tuesday evening, we've received a barrage of emails and texts from friends saying they love us, are praying for us, are here for us, sharing similar stories, etc. Hearing from them and knowing we have their love and support, don't always have to be the strong ones, and can lean on them at this time means the world to us. Friends and family have dropped cards and flowers off, making our house feel brighter. It doesn't make my heart hurt any less or miss Petrie any less, but man, it feels good to be loved on a little as Tyge said. I am speechless at the outpouring of love we've received these past two days. We are beyond blessed.